This Is Us...This Is Me

I have a lot of favorite TV series, from "Game of Thrones", to "The OC" to "Lost" but I don't know that any series has moved me the way "This Is Us" has. It brings me back to when I first started the series. I've been single for most of my time since returning home and Jamaican men are not shy about the promiscuous lifestyle; it is very much the norm. I've been asked more times than I can remember why don't you sleep around? You should have as much sex with as many women as possible while you're single. Honestly, I've always had an ideal in my mind about a family, being a husband, and having kids. I've loved the idea of chivalry and romance even when I was a small kid growing up. There's a sense of virtue almost like a higher form of reasoning. The one-night stand, the friends-with-benefits arrangments has never quite appealed to me because I think it misses the connection component that really gets me going. Not to say that great sex or attractive women don't appeal to me or even the chase or the test of your charm. These are exciting prospects I think most heterosexual men share.

For me aspiring towards the man I want to become has always been paramount and to be fair many of the men I know even after they get married still stray for the excitement of the chase and physical satisfaction. That is most certainly not the man I wish to become.

However, there was a period when the loneliness combined with the desire to have fun started to creep into my mind. Being the extreme personality that I am I had to make a final decision as to whether I'd make a drastic change and start chasing women only to fulfill sexual desires and nothing more. I started to rationalize it in my mind, thinking that monogamy is not natural and we are forcing ourselves to control our urges. Oddly enough this is when I tuned into my first episode of 'This Is Us'. Enter Jack Pearson.

Watching this amazingly romantic husband and compassionate and fun father navigate some of the most difficult times and make his wife and kids feel like the most important people in the world, moved me to tears. He was just so flawless in his display of love that I've never been more inspired by a fictional character. I knew right away once I saw Jack in action that I was never going to be the flamboyant playboy bedding different ladies every night. My calling is to become an amazing husband and father. I remember this scene with Jack for the first time joining his friends on the golf course and his friends were talking about this is where they go to escape the nagging of their wives where they can be free and be men. After a bit of them complaining Jack said...honestly my wife is not someone to escape from, as a matter of fact, I can't think of a place I'd rather be than with her right now and walks right off the golf course. How can you not be moved...

Ever since then I recommitted to being the gentleman, the husband to be, the father to be, it's actually when I started writing this blog! It hasn't always been easy, I'm sure many a person has suspected I was gay. I tend not to flirt with random women and I've never had a sexual partner that I wasn't interested in pursuing a genuine relationship with. I don't view promiscuity in a negative light either, I've always tried to be understanding, empathetic, and non-judgmental and I know there is value in different paths. Mine though has always been the search for an epic love story. One filled with moving gestures, spontaneous dates, thoughtful calls, old-school penned letters! I've been asked a lot what are you looking for in a woman? My answer: "A copilot! Not a passenger." I want to share adventures and be present with my prospective partner, build a family, nurture them and create joy!"This Is Us" is an emotionally beautiful display of the love of family and how that love can help them overcome tragedy and hardship and how that love can lead to heartwarming moments of elation. I want nothing more than to create that reality for myself and my copilot... This Is Me!